NOW NOW NOW!
- Student: Hello. I'm calling from Spain. I need to know decision of my application now because I need to sort visa.
- University: [gets details of application] Sir, you only applied for the course an hour ago.
- Student: Yes but I need to know now.
- University: Yes sir but you've literally just applied. You won't get a decision in an hour it takes a week to process.
- Student: But I've applied.
- University: Yes but you only applied an hour ago. It takes a week.
- Student: Okay I ring up in an hour.
Have you applied?
- Student: Hello, I wanted to check the status of my application.
- University: Sure, what's your number?
- Student: I only have my UCAS number.
- University: That's fine.
- [quotes over details, find nothing]
- University: Sorry, have you applied to the uni?
- Student: I applied to UCAS.
- University: Yes but did you apply to the uni? Through clearing?
- Student: Yes, I applied through clearing. 5 months ago.
- University: 5 months ago?
- Student: Yes.
- University: Are you sure you applied to London Metropolitan?
- Student: I have letter from UCAS.
- University: Yes but did you actually apply?
- Student: Can you not just tell me if I got in or not?
- University: You haven't applied though. You're not on our system.
- Student: Wait.. I have to apply? I don't just get contacted by universities via UCAS I've gotten into?
- University: Yes.. you have to apply. UCAS doesn't automatically apply to universities for you.
- Student: That's stupid. What am I paying for?
I'd like to change to
- Student: Hi, I've applied for [course] but I'd like to change it.
- University: What course were you thinking of changing to?
- Student: Oh urm... do you do [random subject]?
- University: [looks for it and can't find it] Have you seen this on our website?
- Student: No, I'm just checking if you do it or not.. Okay how about [random course]?
- University: Sorry, are you trying to change your course but you don't know what you want to do?
- Student: I just don't fancy doing the course I applied for anymore... What about [random course]?
- University: Can you please go on our website and check which course you'd like to do before wishing to change?
- Student: Yeah I suppose [call cuts]
I WILL WAIT!
- Student: I recieved an email yesterday asking me to reply with my [subject] qualification. Why can't they just forward the details I sent a month ago?
- University: The reason is probably to speed up the process regarding your application. Have you replied to the email?
- Student: No and I shouldn't have to.
- University: You've been asked to supply qualification information. If you don't supply it then your application won't progress.
- Student: Well I sent it ages ago and I will not SCAN it all in again just because.
- University: They've asked you do as it's probably quicker than requesting your information from another department and waiting for the details to be sent through. It'll save your application a week and a half of processing.
- Student: Well I'll have to wait a week and a half then won't I?
- University: Urm.... If you wish to.
- Student: I WILL! [cuts]
Career Advice
- Some College Career Advisor: One of our students wishes to do Psychology at your university in the future. I just wanted to confirm the requirements with you.
- University: Sure [details entry requirements]
- Some College Career Advisor: And what kind of recommended courses would you advise doing at A Level?
- University: Well A-Level Psychology would probably be a good start for anyone looking at doing a degree in the same subject.
- Some College Career Advisor: A Psychology A-Level?
- University: Yes, having a Psychology A-Level will really boost their chances with getting into the course.
- Some College Career Advisor: How strange.
- University: What do you mean?
- Some College Career Advisor: I don't understand how a Psychology A-Level will help someone who wants to do a degree in Psychology.
- University: Of course it would help. It would compliment the course perfectly.
- Some College Career Advisor: Well I'm not sure about that but I'll relay the information anyway.
I is only applyin' innit
- [After gaining details, I put caller on hold to read through notes. We can still hear the caller when they are on hold however. They just can't hear us]
- Student: [to her friend] mate, I dun even wanna do dis course. Like, I just want the loan money innit?
- Student: [still to her friend] AH MAN! Fink of the bags! I know. I KNOW! Ah, your eyes look so pretty.
- Student: {still to her friend] Man, they kept me waiting man. Imma cut this bitch if she takes any longer, y'know?
- University: Okay, I'm just going to put you through to the admissions tutor, okay?
- Student: Oh, thank you so much for all of your help!
What do I do?
- Student: Hi, I got this letter through with all this password stuff. What do I need to do?
- University: Is it a username and password?
- Student: Yeah...
- University: Have you read the WHOLE letter?
- Student: Nah, just skimmed.
- University: The letter actually tells you what to do step by step.
- Student: Ah, really?
- University: Yes.
- Student: Maybe I'll like do that or sumfink.
- University: Right, anything else?
- Student: Nah, this letter tells me everything! [hangs up]
My Password
- Student: Hi, I've not heard anything about my application. Do you know what's going on with it?
- University: Have you been checking your emails?
- Student: What is the password for my email?
- University: I wouldn't know your university password as that it sent through via post.
- Student: No, my hotmail password.
- University: You want to know your password for your hotmail account?
- Student: Yes, can you tell me?
- University: ...... No.
- [call cuts]
Have you got my?
- Student: Hi, I wanted to know if you got my qualifications through. It's really important that I know NOW.
- University: When did you send them?
- Student: What do you mean?
- University: What day did you send them to us? Did you do it via fax, post or email?
- Student: Oh, I haven't sent them yet.
- University: Well we wouldn't have them if you haven't sent them.
- Student: ... [hangs up]
Am I bothered?
- Student: Hi, I was told the conditions of my application is to have an English C, but I got a D. So like, what do I do?
- University: We can put you in for an English test and if you pass then then we can offer you a place. Shall I book you?
- Student: Ugh, I don't want to do an English test. Can you not just let me in?
- University: Unfortunatly that is the condition of your application. You would need to pass it to get a place.
- Student: But I well can't be bothered, you know? Can you just withdraw my application then?
- University: Are you sure?
- Student: yeah, tests are shit [hangs up]
- [Checks students details, has applied for a course that is exam focused rather than coursework focused]
